REVIEW
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Aphex Twin:
"Richard D. James Album" U.S. Release, January 28, 1997
Total 15 tracks - Combined UK release RDJ + Girl/Boy UK EP
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The best thing about this CD is the fact that I did not have to
pay full price for it. The record store has a continual sale on new
releases. I got it for $13.75, which makes the applied cost just under a
dollar per track, which for the first time in my Aphex Twin buying history
equals pretty much what each track is actually worth, if that much.
I loathe most of the tracks. I'd like to slap the loser from
Raygun Magazine who gave this excuse for an album a favorable review. Most
of the disc is either childish or crass or both and quite frankly, I've
had farts that sounded better. This release is not at all exemplary of
Aphex Twin's prior and monumental endeavors. This CD is so bad that I
wonder if this was not intended to be a joke, or an experiment on the part
of the artist to see just what the public will buy just because it has his
name on it. In that instance I would have to give a hand-clap, for I was
indeed inticed by expectations based solely on his previous reputation and
history. In any other case I would have to suggest that RDJ try composing
sober and after a good night's sleep - for his presumed lifestyle has
finally taken its toll on his creative abilities.
On the other and more objective hand, I must admit that nothing is
all bad. I did experience a few good moments while listening to this CD.
And, I did listen to it 4 times in a row - which proves that while it
might really suck, it's not impossible to listen to.
On the whole, though, I must stick to my position in stating that
this is a ridiculous excuse for a release and the man really needs to
re-work the whole thing. The tracks are so short that they are almost
pointless, and the general mood is similar to that of a Radio Shack
electronics display and not the severe dark and dramatic Aphex Twin most
of his enthusiasts have come to expect. The cover art is well-done with
the exception of the scrawled type of the titles. I continue to ponder the
point of listing titles if you aren't going to make them readable. Why not
return to the non-titled mode of SAWII? The back cover is interesting -
I can't tell if it's snippets from the front image or a photo-montage
homage to the vagina, but I'm not complaining either way. The inside
jacket is a step above hack computer imaging and the gatefold is something
we can only hope for if he continues to release crap like this.
The following is a track-by-track commentary:
(Please correct me where I'm wrong on the titles...)
* Track One: "4" c.3m.30s
A promising start which becomes disappointment inside 15 seconds. Has RDJ
switched to using Casio portables? The tempo shifts are annoying because
they are awkwardly thrown into the song. The beats are canned and at many
points sound as if he had hit the 'fill-in' button on one of the
previously mentioned battery-operated items. The high pitched notes peak
out the overall annoying aspects of the track, making it altogether
noxious. The lone good point about this track is the vocal smaple and the
muted sound of a phone dialling.
* Track Two: "Cornish Acid" c.2m.10s
One of the more solid tracks on the CD. Nicely rounded synth waves in the
background with mostly regular beats - Nothing as simple as 1-2-3-4 but
consistent - more like 1-2-1-1-1-2-1-2-3-3-4, but the song ends before it
really starts with a beep, which is the intro into track 3.
* Track Three: "Peek 824545201" c.3m.0s
A close tie for one of the best tracks on the CD. Nice beats - but the
vibraphonic synths need to go away - Beats dissolve once, and this time
effectively - then are quickly reinstated - Definitely not the worst
track, but too short to mean much at all.
* Track Four: "Fingerbib" (?) c.3m.40s
This track is suck mountain with beautiful valleys in between the peaks of
horribleness. He definitely needs to remix this one, removing the silly
little ping-boing canned junk that sounds like the Reading Rainbow theme,
slowing it down a bit and keep the smoothe middle portions.
* Track Five: "Corn Mouth" c.2m.25s
This track has merit among the rest, but that's about as far as it goes.
Typical Aphexian chaos beats, interesting sound samples, pseudo-oriantal
high-pitched headaches inbetween irk me - Very nice ending! Sounds like
the CD suddenly skips and then dies - Something I have long wanted someone
to do. I have no idea why, I guess I figured it would sound neat.
* Track Six: "To Cure A Weakling Child" c.3m.55s
Begins with nice kid-voice sample manipulations - beat kicks in gradually
and then explodes a bit - kid loops continue - The main drawback : Cheesy
synths. Well-done corrosion at the end.
* Track Seven: "Goon Gumpos" (?) c.1m.57s
Sounds like Christmas Muzak at the intro - continues to suck throughout
the rest of the track.
* Track Eight: "Yellow Calx" (?) c.2m.55s
Nice intro, slowly rolling beat moves in - still good - Percussive range,
still good - well-blended chaos and samples - Nice chop and fade ending -
Hey - A contender for the top of the list! But then, it's less than 3
minutes long.
* Track Nine | Girl/Boy Track One: "Girl/Boy Song" c.4m.40s
Miraculously breaks the 4 minute barrier! Nice track, A definite choice
for number one on the CD - Very nice synth progressions - The beats are
calm enough to let an actual melody through -
* Track Ten | Girl/Boy Track Two: "---------- Witch" (???) c.3m.30s
Sounds are not annoying here for one single reason:
The combination of mouth harp, slide flute and organ is strangely
appropriate. Neat track.
* Track Eleven | Girl/Boy Track Three: "Milkman" c.4m.06s
This is my favorite track - Qualitatively it isn't the best on the disc,
but I love these lines:
"I wish the milkman would deliver more milk when I'm yawning'
and
"I would like some milk from the milkman's wife's tits."
* Track Twelve | Girl/Boy Track Four: "Inkey$" (?) c.1m.18s
Dark, eerie, grinding, TOOO DAMMNED SHORRRT!
* Track Thirteen | Girl/Boy Track Five:
"Girl/Boy ([Pound Symbol] 18 Snore Rush Mix) (?) c.1m.52s
Starts - and that's about it. It ends right then as well.
* Track Fourteen | Girl/Boy Track Six: "Beetles" c.1m.25s
A stupid waste of disc space.
Though the guy rambling about frying up vegetables with cheese is kind of
funny.
* Track Fifteen | Girl/Boy Track Seven:
"Girl/Boy (Red Ruth Mix)" c.3m.50s (?)
Very nice track - no real complaints - tie for the top I think -
Ends with an energy-static type of craziness - wouldn't call it a hidden
track or anything...
In conclusion I would recommend a total remix project. Take the
best elements of the CD, lengthen them and re-release with an apology to
the suckers who bought the rough draft.
Jasonosaj
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"I paint what I think, not what I see..." - Pablo Picasso
"You're not the boss of me!..." - J. A. Hutto (Pre age 3)
http://www2.msstate.edu/~jah10 + jah10@ra.msstate.edu