Yes, it is time once again for the...
23rd Annual Stump-The-Lancebot Competition
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With half-hearted corporate sponsorship provided by Ford, Hyperreal,
Grooves Magazine and Reuterz LTD
Objective >>
Come up with a mind-bending query so infinitesmally obscure
or impossibly retortable that Lance "Lancebot" McGannon will
have smoke coming out of his ears.
Grand Prize >>
Our prize patrol will personally mail the owner of the best
submission a brand-spanking new pair of garden shears
autographed by the judging panel. That panel consisting of
myself and a non-autographing, yet confident Magic 8-Ball.
Creativity and humor are keys to success. Please don't come up
with trite questions about truly obscure IDM musicians and
truly obscure releases. Who cares if V/VM sold out on their run
of 8-track cassettes?
The winner will be notified privately for shipping info. We
will not be having an awards ceremony in Stockholm, Sweden this
year, but if you still want to go, knock yourself out. Tell King
Gustav that I said hello and that he can keep his damn Nobels.
Honorable mentions will be provided for runner-ups. Everyone
else will be subject to ridicule and taunting without mercy.
Submission Guidelines >>
Email your submission to the IDM mailing list before 11:59 PM
June 10, 2001. Late submissions will result in dumb stares
and possibly some drooling, if the mood strikes me. A winner
will be picked sometime thereafter.
Some Previous Winners >>
1997 Finalist Erde Maemnitz --
"Do squirrels blink?"
1994 Finalist Dr. E. N. Proto --
"Will advances in nanofibre fabrics in 2063 make the pimps and
ho's of the future even more stylish than they are now?"
Warnings >>
Zen koans are strictly verboten. Any cheater who tries to pull
one off will be disqualified from this and all future contests.
Anyone distantly related to or friends with Lance McGannon
may still participate, but a winning entry will result in the
prize being mailed with third-class postage, instead of second-
class.
Residents of Kentucky, Virginia, and Luxembourg are disqualified
from participation. To paraphrase Louis Armstrong, if you have to
ask why, you will never know...
Good luck, contestants!
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