FAQ Rough Draft #1
-- Is it okay to MIME on this list?
No. We've been over this before. People who MIME will be taken out to a
back alley and hosed down by Hyperreal security crew. No exceptions.
-- Are PGP and S/MIME signatures allowed in posts?
Yes. In fact, Hyperreal management encourages you to digitally sign all
your posts. For maximum security, we ask that you please choose a
bit-length and signature as long as possible. That way, we can positively
identify you before the massive email carpet-bombing starts.
-- What's the policy on HTML posts?
Nothing says, "I'm on the cutting edge of multimedia and you're not,"
better than posting in HTML. However, we do try to discourage the use of
non-standard XML tags, such as <g> and <sarcasm>.
-- Are there any topics for which the content is off-limit or
inappropriate to the IDM list?
Of course not. Feel free to expound upon any subject of your choice. Don't
feel hindered by the fact that a post might have absolutely nothing to do
with IDM, or with music in general.
For example, the ongoing debate between the qualities of CDs and vinyl as
a storage medium -- and why 8-tracks are superior to both -- is always
popular.
Other topics that come up from time to time are: "Why can't chicks DJ?",
"Why do chicks suck at making dance music?", etc. Get creative and call
people "artfags" if you don't agree with them. Question sexual identities.
Use naughty language. Etc.
We also encourage any political statements from those who would like to
use the IDM list as a personal soapbox. To the Negativland fans and other
amateur copyright lawyers, Mumia bandwagon jumpers, depressed former NIN
fans, and anyone else with a gripe and an itch to bore: this is your list,
too.
As a matter of policy, we recommend that, if anyone disagrees with your
point of view, you should repeat what you say and do so louder than the
other guy. Using UPPERCASE LETTERS will definitely get people's attention.
-- What's the policy on posting radio playlists on IDM?
Who listens to the radio at three in the morning? Who gives a shit about
AM radio? Let's get realistic about this.
-- I have a trade/for sale/auction list of five hundred records or so, can
I post it?
Nothing says, "I rule and you all suck," like a comprehensive list of all
the cool records you own, especially if such a list takes up an entire
digest. Who cares whether or not people buy your records? You've just
gained instant street cred having simply *owned* this stuff. (Be sure to
keep those MC Hammer and Huey Lewis and the News tapes off your list,
though. It's not hip to be square.)
-- I want to impress everyone on the list, but how do I get started?
Easy. Convert all your rare MASK, SKAM, Warp, V/VM, whatever tracks into
MP3 files. Publish them on a web server in Estonia or Kreblahkistan or
wherever. Publicize heavily on the IDM list. Sit back and wait for the
lawyers/record executives/thugs to call you in the wee hours of the morn'
and threaten to drag you away and break your legs. Bitch about getting
caught. Become an overnight celebrity.
-- I'm a copyright lawyer and would like to make some easy cash...
After referring to the previous answer, just sit back and wait.
-- I'd like to start my own record label and put out electronic music...
The best way to make truckloads of money in the IDM music business is to
generate and sustain hype for a product that doesn't yet exist. It is
perhaps noteworthy that you don't actually need any real, live musicians to
do this, either.
Spreading rumors on the list that an unheard-of label will be put together
with unheard-of artists usually does the trick. Pretend to be a label
fronted in some foreign country thousands of miles away, and tell music
distributors that you'll only be putting out ten or so copies of the first
release in their country. Imply the same level of scarcity to the readers
on the IDM list. Use lots of punctu//ation <<in YOUR emails>>to let them
k.n.o.w. you're for REAL;;
Meanwhile, back in your "studio/kitchen", sample some pots and pans
dropping on the floor and loop it. Have some sound engineers clean it up
and press it. Call it "part one" of an ambient series your label is working
on. (Who'll notice, anyway?) Kick back with a cool Coors sixteen-ouncer and
watch the money pour into your Swiss bank account.
A tip for advanced IDM record label executives: Be sure to keep a few
hundred copies to yourself. Once the "limited release" sells out and the
speculation starts, join in the fun and profits!
__________________________________________________________________________
Alex Reynolds Distributed Support Specialist
Department of Biology School of Arts & Sciences Computing
University of Pennsylvania Philadelphia, PA
email:reynolda@sas.upenn.edu phone:215.573.2818
Interviewer--what do the words mean? Brian Eno--what do the chords mean?