IDM Mailing Archive

In a message dated 02/04/97 06:02:01, you write:

quoted 3 lines IDM ? excuse me ? C'mon man, the article WASN'T ABOUT OUR FAVORITE

> IDM ? excuse me ? C'mon man, the article WASN'T ABOUT OUR FAVORITE > MUSIC. It was about Mall Shit, big sellers etc. Next years > Lollapalooza.

Dateline, Los Angeles, New Years Day 2000 - Electronic Hip-Hop star Richard James, AKA Aphex Twin and, more recently, Milkman, committed suicide on the stroke of midnight, by force feeding himself with smash until his stomach lining exploded. It is believed a hand-scrawled note was left at the scene, describing his inability to cope with the stress of being a world-famous rock star, and his increasing tension with the other members of his group Harmonika - Florian Schneider, Geoffrey 'Rainbow' Hayes, Vangelis, and the mysterious holographic guru only known as 'Clappo'. It revealed confessions of adultery commited behind the back of his wife, the film company executive Melanie Griffith, though a name is not revealed - the secret mistress is given the pet name 'my big green teddy bear' and is rumoured to be an old flame from his Brit-Pop days. Friends and relatives in southern England - a small town located in the far south-east of the U.S - have expressed their shock and dismay over last night's events. One, who did not wish to be named, gave us this statement - 'Ah, he was a twat anyway. Mad as a sock, and he never remembered us at the chip shop once he got on that big jet plane for LA. We were glad to see the back of him, noisy bugger. Mind you, his mum and dad might have a use now for that fake gravestone he left in their back yard.' His estate of 17.2 trillion dollars and 14 adjacent terraced houses in Beverly Hills was left to his wife Melanie, and their children MS-10 and MS-20. His gold-plated light Scorpion tank, a gift from his record company Sire, is expected to be repossessed by said company for breach of contract. Control of the New BBC Radiophonic Workshop, the company Mr James set up after his hostile takeover of the BBC, and home to such aspiring talents as Wilfred Banks the Whistling Chimp, will be handed over to old business partner Michael Paradinas, currently a weatherman in Ohio, Florida. Cheerio! What's On The Sound Burger? Allocation M - Random Fluctuations / Bochum Welt