I found this on the bottom of my shoe as I was leaving the 'loo at a bar this morning. I guess it dint make it "in". Maybe too many people have read this already for it to be interesting for all us intuhlekshools, like the ideas in it are all used up like, but I thought it right silly.
Rind
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Not to flog a Trojan Horse, but...
I can't fathom the intense interest there seems to be with Boards of Canada. I've listened to everything they've done, mainly out of curiosity - to see what such a loud buzz was about. I've been more underwhelmed with each release. With this new record from them, I think they've actually unimpressed me so much that they have taken music away somehow. Created a kind of anti-music or negativemusic which cancels out some other interesting music. From what people say I always expect some great new thing - from those heights of hype, the plummet to reality and my splat of disappointment is greater. What a shame. What is everyone thinking, I think. What do they hear that I don't - after all these years of polishing my ears with every musical solvent and soap? Am I only hearing half of the music somehow? Is there a secret music or way of playing the discs backwards that gives them their revered meaning to the enlightened? I plain don't get it. What I hear is very pedestrian for this day and age, very predictable, very "safe". Dare I say that they might to be called the Boreds from Canada?
If you had heard Einsturzende Neubauten, Nurse With Wound, Foetus, or even the Residents, Tuxedomoon, Throbbing Gristle, early Eno, Fripp, Arvo Part, Conlon Noncarrow, Boyd Rice, Eugene Chadbourne, Glenn Branca, Cabaret Voltaire, Cluster, Neu!, Terry Riley, John Cage, Ken Nordine, Gong, Harry Partch, Henry Cowell, Varese and all those other unsung experimental music pioneers, or even Martin Denny, not to mention Phillip flippin Glass, or Kraftwerk, and newer things like Twine, Oval, Climax Golden Twins, Black Dice, Wolf Eyes, Stars of the Lid, Tim Hecker, Negativland, the Books, Vladislav Delay, etc, etc, well, you wouldn't be impressed with Boards of Canada either. Compared to any of these other artists, the artist in question is not what you'd call adventurous, original, or anything more than mildly competent; maybe professionally workmanlike is more apt. Its well done with clean, square edges; all well sanded and painted and put together in the accustomed style and completely unobtrusive and carefully inoffensive, and universally palatable. My 5 and 6 year old children don't mind Boards of Canada - in fact they ignore it when its on. Whereas they react strongly to things like Wolf Eyes or Tim Hecker - which they immediately don't like - a lot. Other things like Negativland, the Books, Oval and Kraftwerk they just as immediately love. Why do they hate some music, love some so much, and totally ignore other music? They can't tell me, so I can't tell you. But it's an interesting question. After all, taste is such a personal thing, isn't it? We all have our niggling doubts about what we like and why... I think my mother wouldn't mind Boards of Canada - it would fit her idea of "electronic" music. New music to bring home to Mum! Its shaven, showered, wears clean clothes, brings flowers and always says "Please" and "Thank You". It doesn't ride a motorcycle, smoke, or look a shade too... "dark".
While its not really fair to place music upon one man's scales of worth, and probably worrying for you all to hear such heresy, I feel that someone has to say something before this Boards of Canada thing goes too far and becomes a dangerous cult with an antisocial manifesto, preaching the end of music that is not like Boards of Canada, and then finally drinking deadly Koolaid or shooting it out with the ATF and taking down a lot of good musicians and music lovers with them. To be fair, I would rather listen to Boards of Canada than a lot of other things. Millions of other things. But as long as I have a choice, I won't listen to those other things when I can help it, nor will I choose to listen to Boards of Canada again.
If there is anyone out there who has listened with interest to all of the above over the years, that can tell me with all of their hard won musical experience that they can still go "woo-hoo!" Boards of Canada!? No one under 30 need reply. You simply haven't lived long enough yet.
Bottoms
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