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From:
Renee Baker
To:
,
Date:
05 Aug 1996 16:29:45 -0700
Subject:
Re[2]: (idm) Italian food & crop circles
Msg-Id:
<0224B320683E9009*/c=us/admd=telemail/prmd=nasa/o=jpl/ou=ccmail/s=Baker/g=Nanette/i=R/@MHS>
Mbox:
idm.9608.gz
Z3: I checked with all of the top sources here at JPL and when I approached them on the subject of the alien-graffiti theory they all became quiet and whispery. Then they started to make some phone calls and pointed their fingers. I have this terrible sinking feeling that the men-in-black will be coming to visit you soon. As for me, I wouldn't be surprised to see the nice men-in-white paying a visit to my office...oh my gosh...here they come...uhhhh, this looks like this will be my very last posting to the list! It's been fun folks... Renee (Hey, these rubber walls are really soft. Do they come in any other color than white?) _______________________________________________________________________________ Subject: Re: (idm) Italian food & crop circles From: feszczak@sas.upenn.edu at Internet Date: 05-08-1996 16:14
quoted 2 lines Call me a culinary idiot, but I had a good laugh when I went out to eat at a>Call me a culinary idiot, but I had a good laugh when I went out to eat at a >new Italian restaurant here. One of the menu items was "Funghi Porcini".
Well, yes, my Italian spy tells me that porcini are one of the most expensive mushrooms, and most sought after by the refined for their taste. I must not be particularly refined, since I feel that all mushroom should be left on the ground in those circles made by forest fairies and/or UFOs. Speaking of UFOs, a rather ambient topic is those damn crop circles. I almost had a stroke laughing the other day, viewing serious academics and "scientists" discussing their cutting-edge research into the crop-circle "mystery". Then I became quite serious (as I sometimes do, especially when I think of money, or its peculiar absence), and considered a solution to my studio-funding dilemma. Since my pleas for charity have gone unheeded by the coldhearted Aphex-worshipping world, I must consider other means. So, I thought about getting funding for a grant to study graffiti. Clearly, graffiti is the work of space aliens. It's too complex and patterned to be the product of natural forces. It couldn't be a prank because no one could create such complex patterns overnight in a public place, without being noticed. Therefore, ipso facto, post hoc ergo propter hoc, ALIENS. As final evidence, consider that the government has published absolutely no studies on the alien-graffiti connection. Therefore, those studies must all be top top secret. Therefore, there must be a really important story which the government is hiding from us!!! Don't go trying to steal my grant idea now. I thought of it first. Though collaborators are welcome, as long as my name goes first on the Nobel Prize. Zenon M. Feszczak Ambientologist P.S. REQUIRED IDM CONTENT FOLLOWS: Bill Laswell "Dub System 1" is a beautiful thing.